Audacity in Truth

My heart was burdened a while ago and I couldn’t quite frankly pinpoint why but I could gather that it was because I was looking at people who seemed to be “doing well” in their callings on social media. I wasn’t jealous of them in the sense that I want what they have, but in some way, I did want what they have. I want the accomplishment and the feeling of excelling and being celebrated for what I do.

Before heading down to prayer that night, I had a little pity party moment. The tears flowed and I asked God to give me wisdom to navigate this season that I am in. I was feeling frustrated with the pace of my journey within the season.

I saw a couple of people post about “The city of God” one of the new songs by Dunsin Oyekan and it passed a subliminal message to me and I thought to marinate in the atmosphere of the song as they did that I might experience what they did. Right before heading downstairs to our living room, I felt some lifting since I prayed the prayer above, but I wanted freedom that I knew would come in my place of prayer.

I turned on the song and put in on repeat, for the first couple of repeats, it was just a song to me, nothing else. Then I began to sing along and began to pray along in the Spirit and I felt more and more lifted with every rotation of the song.

At the last rotation, I felt a passage imprint on my heart. Now I know some bible verses, but not always the particular chapter and verse and often have to use google to pinpoint the exact verse, but the book is always right and sometimes I just have the chapters and verses mixed up as it was this particular case. I opened Matthew 24:11 and I read it and saw that this wasn’t it, then I went to Matthew 11:24, but that wasn’t it either. I scrolled down a bit on my bible app and saw the verse that I was hearing in my heart. It was Chapter 28 “ Come to me all ye who labor and are heavy laden and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly at heart and you will fined rest for your souls. For My yoke in easy and My burden is light”.

From this chapter I gathered that when we come to God, there is a transaction taking place, it just cannot be a bribed. We are asking God for something in exchange for something. For me that night, my intent was for the heaviness and weight in my heart to be taken away and for God to speak ease into my heart. This however is the powerful thing about transactions of this kind. When we ask God and He does take it away as we prayed and He gives us His peace, its not supposed to be a temporary thing, but rather a permanent fixture. I am to leave my burdens with Him and not pick it back up and take on his yoke that is easy. If my burden is too heavy to carry that I needed the help of God in the initial place, then the most sensical thing would be to take up a “burden” that is lighter than mine. God is able to take on my burdens, he’s able to carry them and bear them and in return he gives me peace.

So in-line with the song I was listening to, I also gathered that when I leave my burdens with God and take up his Yoke, His river flows unhindered on the inside of me. That river can flow in different dimensions ( Inspirations, ideas…etc) however, when I go back to pick up the burden that I was supposed to have left with God, it ceases the flow of the river. It stifles Him because I become burdened once again with my fears and worry. God can not move in an atmosphere of doubt and worry.

So as Jesus instructs in Matthew 11:29-30 “ Take my yoke upon you and learn from me for I am gentle and lowly at heart and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke in easy and my burden is light”. Take is an action verb, which requires intentionality and deliberateness from me. It is not passive. I must intentionally lay all down, my insecurities and fears and Take his Yoke. Take on the things that he wants me to, learn to walk in the path that he leads which means asking HIM where to go.

I want this season to mean something. I want to come out of it knowing that The Lord touched me, and broke some things off my life and I am walking dependent solely on HIM. I know its not easy, especially when I am not used to leaving everything in the hands of God, I feel like there are some things that I can’t yet trust God with and I need some sort of control on the matter. As I am learning in this season, Faith is an all-in program. I either trust God all the way or I don’t trust Him at all.

I asked for Wisdom to navigate this season, and the Lord spoke. In our seasons, God speaks and we must be attentive to hear and listen. For now, my word is “Leave it with God and don’t take it back”. The transaction is meant to be final, no returns.

This is also for anyone who is in a transition season and it seems as if God is silent or you are tarrying too long in an unwanted season, leave it all at the altar. It might seem that nothing is happening, but indeed something is and God is working on the most important factor during any season, your heart and He won’t leave you until you are perfect for what He has planned. So trust Him and let Him be God.